Have you ever seen someone who looks far older than their real age; not because life is hard, but because they are carrying grudges?
Some of us squeeze our faces from morning till night. Day after day, the face begins to resemble those Osuka. The cloth wrapped aid a bowl of water why on the head. Wrinkled, tired, and stressed.
Someone offended you many years ago and you are still discussing it in 2025. The offence has become a permanent tenant. Even when people try to apologize, they must gather the whole family and sometimes even the elders cannot convince you.
But the truth is simple: Holding on to offence never punishes the offenders alone; it punishes you too.
1. WHY YOU HOLD ON TO OLD WOUND
• You replay the pain because it feels familiar.
• Pride makes it difficult to apologize or accept apologies.
• You think letting go means the other person won.
• You hold the offence like a badge of honour.
• You underestimate how much emotional weight it adds to your lives.
(Proverbs 19:11)
“A person’s wisdom yields patience; it is to one’s glory to overlook an offence.”
2. HOW IT AFFECTS YOU
• It steals your joy and peace.
• It drains mental and emotional energy.
• It shows on your face (tension, wrinkles, heaviness.)
• It slows your progress because your hearts remain stuck.
• Bitterness blocks spiritual clarity and sensitivity.
(Proverbs 17:22)
A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.
3. SIGNS YOU ARE STILL CARRYING OLD GRUDGES. . You still talk about what happened years ago.
• Your mood changes when the person’s name is mentioned.
• You bring old issues into new conversations.
• You avoid people because of past hurts, not present realities.
• You expect people to gather “elders” before you forgive.
• You remember the offence more easily than you remember God’s mercy.
(Hebrews 12:15)
See to it… that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many.
4. WHY FORGIVENESS IS NECESSARY.1
• It heals the heart and brings inner peace.
• It restores the joy bitterness has stolen.
• It allows you to move forward without emotional baggage.
• It strengthens your relationship with God.
• Jesus taught that bitterness and blessings cannot live in the same heart.
(Matthew 6:12)
“Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.”
(Matthew 6:14)
“For if you forgive others… your heavenly Father will also forgive you.”
5. HOW TO LET GO. • Admit the hurt honestly before God.
• Choose forgiveness intentionally, not emotionally.
• Stop replaying the offence in your mind.
• Pray for strength instead of rehearsing bitterness.
• Refuse to retaliate when given the chance.
• Release the person for your own peace, not theirs.
• Relax your face, relax your heart breathe again.
(1 Peter 5:7)
“Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.”. Be kind and compassionate… forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:32)
FINAL NOTE
Life is too short to carry old wounds into new seasons.
Let your heart breathe.
Let your face rest.
Let your spirit rise again.
Forgive – Release -Move forward.
Your destiny needs space to blossom.
Reflective Prayer
“Lord, help me to release the hurt I have been carrying. Heal my heart, lighten my spirit, and restore my joy. Teach me to forgive as You forgive, so I can live in peace and walk into the blessings You have prepared for me. Amen.”
REFLECTION QUESTION FOR READERS.
• What old wound or grudge are you holding onto today?
• How will you take the first step to release it this week?Written and Illustrated by Ọmọlọlá Fúnmiláyọ Edokpayi